Wednesday, August 14, 2013

When I'm Gone

This poem I read the other day in pinterest. As I am about to move and have been sad about saying goodbye it really struck me. Also that I had a friend recently pass away who I knew in high school. Life is short or long but it is what it is regardless so remember the best.

When I'm Gone
by Mrs. Lyman Hancock

When I come to the end of my journey
And I travel my last weary mile
Just forget if you can, that I ever frowned
And remember only the smile

Forget unkind words I have spoken
Remember some good I have done
Forget that I ever had heartache
And remember I've had loads of fun

Forget that I've stumbled and blundered
And sometimes fell by the way
Remember I have fought some hard battles
And won, ere the close of the day

Then forget to grieve for my going
I would not have you sad for a day
But in summer just gather some flowers
And remember the place where I lay

And come in the shade of evening
When the sun paints the sky in the west
Stand for a few moments beside me
And remember only my best

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

How long after all?

How long will this remain
I do not know
I sometimes think that is the beauty of it. Every situation has fun, has an energy but has a dark side. Where then am I focusing? Which part am I letting win?
Can you find the positive? There is always a benefit in some way but the trick is finding it.
Take a shift in perspective, find a way for the positive, even if that positive element isn't in your favor.

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Friend

Morbid but I think it's funny thought. When I die I think my tombstone will read "Here lies Wendy. She was a good friend."
I am not fantastic at anything nor am I memorable for the most part but a good enough friend I suppose I try to be. I wish I was better or best but at least I get points for being good. :)

Wednesday, May 08, 2013

Winona playing Mozart

A note on this. I was her very first piano teacher. I am still currently her teacher and the only teacher she has had. She practices a lot though but still makes me so proud! And this is a video which doesn't seem to be loading. :( I'll keep working on how to make that work

Monday, February 25, 2013

I'm a woman



Yes, I realize that is not a surprise to anyone who knows me so keep reading.

I am so thankful I am a woman.
I rejoice in the differences between man and woman. While they outwardly seem sometimes unequal, or less beneficial to be one or another, I am thankful for the woman that I am and for the divinely appointed roles of each.
I am thankful for the gospel and the understanding I am given of my divinity of womanhood. Also why those divine differences are so blessed and beautiful.

This is not a direct response to the recent "events" of the women in the church or outside the church. But due to those things and some other recent conversations, I have been thinking about it.

I was chatting with a male on Saturday evening who told me my sense of womanliness was a very attractive quality. Thank you Mr Unnamed for valuing me as a woman and daughter of God!

Monday, February 18, 2013

A recent learning experience

David Hornby.
Recently I became involved in some kind of relationship with a very nice fellow named David. Technically, I met him and we dated a few times 2 1/2 years ago but in November, we kind of re-met so to speak and the relationship took a turn for the positive.
During this time of dating him, getting to know him via mainly long distance communication, I tried to make some personal progress towards my own dating endeavors. My sister and I had many long conversations because for some reason, even though I initiated this most recent line of relationship, he was the one that pushed it or seemed the most proactive. I kind of like that because as a woman, I want to be chased by a man. And most men like doing the chasing.
And although I did the initiating, my instinct was to run. I'm pretty sure that instinct has a lot to do with the single nature of my life as well. :S
And those long conversations with my sister for some reason this time around were quite different than in the past. This time those comments helped me to feel like I was really growing and understanding myself and understanding relationships differently than I had in previous relationships.
Also, David, being the great guy he is, gave me a sense of calm and trust that I don't often feel. And although that relationship is now over, I feel I have learned a lot and am thankful for that.

So for this reason, I wanted to write here some of the things I have learned from this relationship.
1. I found out I really am more country than I am city. Okay okay so I really have been learning that a lot over the past 2 years of living in Virginia (metro DC area).
2. Even though I told him I wouldn't like to live on a farm someday, I've realized I actually think it would work for me.
3. When I was young, I was always attracted most to men in suits. I still am. And for some reason, guilty secret, I often though that was the kind of guy I would be most interested in or the kind of guy pursuing that kind of job. I was wrong. I would much rather a man who wants to be involved in his families lives, to know the children and to love seeing and being around his wife. From the single men who have those "suit" jobs, I've realized they get stuck in traffic, have to work a lot, and I think the simpler life makes so much more sense.
4. No matter how my "ideal" life is, there is no way to predict how things are going to be. You will never be able to date enough, to ask enough questions or understand what will or won't happen. Yes you still have to get to know a person and date them. But as I've said, and as I realize more now, dating and the advancing steps, are truly a leap of faith.
5. Things change.
6. As scary as it is to express myself and tell someone what I feel, it is important. In past relationships, I've often kept my mouth shut about my opinions or needs and then felt frustration when they were "in love" with me but knew nothing about me. I tried with David to open my mouth about true feelings. Oddly, when that came to telling him I would not like my future to be on a farm, that opinion evolved and brought me to a realization of an opinion different than I expected in my mind.
7. A good relationship should be built on mutual respect, compromise and understanding. Love is a verb which requires active participation. If you understand an attitude or perspective it makes a difference. And every relationship requires compromise.
8. Be in a relationship that makes you want to be better but that you still feel like they accept you for who you are. I often worry due to my "unique personality" (it says that in my Patriarchal Blessing) that in a relationship I would not be accepted and always be walking on eggshells to be acting the part of normalcy. David made me feel accepted just for me.

Well I think those are some good learning points. I feel like I made a lot of emotional progress in this relationship and I am thankful for a person who gave me that opportunity.